Friends, lovers and fans

Or "Part 9 of approximately 42"
Or "More about me, less about Korea"
or "The K-POP tutorial"


So this week I hit my six month mark! Can you believe it? I can not! It is shocking! Shocking I tell you, Shocking! How could I have been here for six months already, it still feels like I just arrived. Well not just arrived, but it does feel like I am Princess Jasmine in that scene where Jafar has trapped her in the massive hour glass and the sand is falling on her head and she is completely overwhelmed. Time is running out, my Korean is terrible, I've fallen of the weight-loss wagon, the grade sixes are leaving in two months and I don't even know all their names! I am not even close to perfecting this being-a-grown-up thing, but six months have come and gone and I am feeling hopeful for the next six.

For the love of Ashika

Today is my friend Ashika's birthday. I miss her terribly and would like to send a Shout-out to her. I just want to say, Ashika, I love you like a limb. I don't want to be parted from you and though I sometimes take you for granted I know life would be much harder without you (which pretty much sums up how I feel about my limbs). I hope our friendship stands the test of time, the test of distance and some other tests. Don't ever let the muggles get you down.


As some of you must have heard in my graduation party speech, I am a friend person, not only friendly (not very friendly) but a friend through and through. I have had difficult friendships, easy friendships, close friendships and really weird friendships in my lifetime but in each of them I have tried to be a good friend. Being a good friend is really important to me and my poor mother had to watch as I put my friendships before my family, before my work and before myself. I try not to do that anymore, but I find it difficult. I have a disease, it's like extreme Ubuntu, Ubuntu to the point where I stone myself for not being in line with the people around me even when what they are doing is detrimental to me. Ubuntu where I spend a lot of time asking myself what I am if the people around me are not happy. Now that I don't see my friends all the time, I find it hard to support them, I find it hard to comfort and enjoy them. I find it hard to make myself available for their enjoyment but at least I still get to be an example to them and learn from their (sorry guys) copious mistakes :-)

Oh romance!

If I am honest I have to admit that things between Sinclair and I are taking some strain. It's better than I could have hoped, 1) He stayed (he hasn't been snatched up by some other girl, Lauren Julies, Illandra Rich, I'm watching you both), 2) He doesn't guilt trip me about coming home (well not everyday) and 3) we are both losing weight (when I get back we're joining Feeders Anonymous) but not having a warm bodied friend and waking up at six to Skype on a weekday does take it's strain and even though we cancel sometimes because we're both too tired or too busy to Skype it does feel like I have more of a responsibility to put the effort in because I am the one that left his poor soul in the most beautiful city in South Africa. I guess long distance is hard for both parties in different ways. I don't feel lonely as often as Sinclair does, because I don't have an empty Sinclair shaped space in my world, but I don't feel as comfortable moaning about missing him and missing South Africa cause I did choose to leave and every morning I choose to stay here and quite frankly, I'm gonna keep choosing this for as long as it takes for me to achieve the goals I came here to achieve. Any way, six months marks the longest time Sinclair and I have been physically apart in our nine year relationship, and while I can see that it's getting more tough we are still going strong. No fights or threats or affairs with work colleagues, no neglect or resentment or tears drenching the keyboard, in short - No drama. Since he's not coming to visit in January anymore I will only see him in July, which means we are still nine months away from physical contact... wish us luck!


I know that a couple of emails ago I went on and on about how much I appreciate the support of the people around me but I cannot say it enough. Thanks you guys! If I ever became famous (lets pray I don’t ever) I’ll be one of those really obnoxious stars that work really hard but accept all my awards saying “To my fans, you guys are the best, I couldn’t have done this without you” when what they mean is “I love that you are obsessed me, please love me more so that I will be motivated to work harder for your approval and people will think I’m worthy” when what I really wanna be is  the Johnny Depp kind of star who basically says “I like doing this so much that I don’t mind that other people think I’m worth more than I’m actually worth”. In short, fans would go straight to my (already oversized) head and try as much as I want I will not be able to see myself realistically. It took me a long time but I’ve accepted that I may be a drama queen but I should never actually study drama and become famous. I love singing so much, and God has blessed me with an awful singing voice because, of course God knew if he gave me a weapon of great power I would accidentally wipe out the whole world and stab myself in the process. The world does not need another Kanye. So to my current fans, love me but not too much, love me in secret, feel free to buy me Jungle Oats.


So, K-POP: Who can guess what that "K" stands for? That's right, KOREA! Lets all say it together "KOREA!" Not to be confused with J-POP which is Japanese pop music. How ever K-POP is like nothing you know of pop music... It's strange and wonderful and one of those things that you either love or hate with your whole soul until it overpowers your soul and forces you to love it! To be honest I hated it when I first heard it, but it grew on me, and now Negachay-Chalaka (I am the best) is one of my favourite songs (In the K-pop genre, not of all times).


The characteristics of K-POP bands: K-POP bands usually have anything between 4 and 14 members of the same sex. They usually have English or partially English names. They have snippets of English in their songs. They do not only sing but sing and dance. Each group has it's own distinct style and cannot be confused with other groups so nothing like the backstreet boys/n'sync blur of the nineties. The groups are made of teenagers or people in their early twenties and usually have a life span of about five years in which they make loads of money before their group is dissolved. This all seems pretty standard so lets get to the weird part.


The weird part: So K-POP is not a genre as much as it is a music industry. By industry I mean factory... Young boys and girls all apply to join specific music academies whose soul function it is to produce K-POP bands. So you apply, get accepted and go and do your time, they give you voice training, dance training, Learn multiple languages (because Korean pop music has become popular in Japan and China too), you have to write exams, they dress you, brand you and when you graduate you are either slotted into an existing K-POP band or you and some of your classmates are formed into a band which is completely managed by the academy. You don't have much agency after you are branded in the group, you will be known as "the cute one" or "the chubby one" or "the weird one" what ever persona you are given in the group is carried through in a very spice girls manner. Scary spice couldn't show up looking posh... although in the end Posh spice did look a little scary. Your entire professional career is planned by the agency and they use the profits to first an foremost make back the money it cost to make you a star.


The even weirder part: So if you do well in your band you can be promoted into to a more successful, usually older K-POP group. You could go Solo but solo artists aren't as popular as the groups are. The lead singer is usually just the most popular girl but she changes throughout the life span of the group and no one is sure if this is because public opinion changes or if the behind the scenes string pullers are affecting public opinion through the media. It really all is a big show.


The on the ground experience: Each of my students have their favourite band and one of the first things I got asked when I arrived at school was which K-POP band is my favourite. I used to say T-ara (pronounced tiara) because it was the only one I knew but now I know a few more and I really like Super Junior and 2ne1 (pronounced 21, I assumed it was pronounced "too anyone", since they also have a single titled "Too anyone" but my students insist they are called 21). foreigners are also into K-POP and Korea’s music groups have large following in Japan the Philippines and China. They are working with some US artists as well but (forgive my skepticism) i think that will probably more to widen the Americans reach and not to have K-POP stars become popular in the US. Although I have heard that K-POP is big underground in the US. I’ll add a few links to the songs that makes me smile, I hope you like it.


I’m gonna end off this email with a little gem that I found that confused and delighted me. It’s a South Korean cover of a popular South African song. In Korea it's sung by BeBe Mignon, here it is. Don’t ask me how they even discovered this song, I always feel like South Korea is so far removed from South Africa but clearly my two worlds are colliding. Imagine how weird I felt hearing that in the shop one day.


That is all for today. I hope you have a wonderful day and that you appreciate the warm weather coming your way. Think of me when you hit the beach for the first time and also if you drive past steers :-)


Peace like a river
Bashti Teacher


Here are the K-POP songs that get my knee a-boppin’


2NE1 - I am the best, Super Junior - Mr Simple, wait till you pass the intro (this one also explains why Sinclair doesn’t have tow worry about me leaving him for a Korean man) and then lastly, 2NE1 - Ugly (i think i just like this one because the chorus is in English and I have some idea of what it’s about, not 100% sure though)


That’s all <3